Bill Clinton Asked To Lose Weight

Former president Bill Clinton has been fighting the battle of the bulge for quite some time. As the day grows near for his daughter's wedding, however, Chelsea is asking her dad to lose 15 pounds for the occasion.


Slimming Down The Aisle

Bill Clinton's looking toward the day
He walks his daughter down the aisle
To give his little girl away;
He hopes to do it in high style.

With such a happy day ahead,
Bill and Chelsea have had a chat,
And bride-to-be asked dad to shed
Fifteen pounds of ugly fat.


© 2010 Jim Gordon

Tiger Woods Getting Back To "Normal"

Fans greeted Tiger Woods in North Carolina with warm applause. Woods is playing in the Quail Hollow Championship in his road to resuming his career on he golf course.


Tiger On The Tee

Despite the lack of fan fare
And little camera-clicking,
Tiger had a good time,
And it's sure the fans weren't kicking.

He's playing at Quail Hollow
In his quest for "back to normal"
As he greets folks in the gallery
And seems a bit less formal.

He'll start off Thursday morning;
In a field, again, with Phil.
And plans to have a real good time
As he re-hones his golfing skill.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Supreme Court OKs Cross

The Supreme Court has ruled that a war memorial in the form of a cross can stay at the Mojave National Preserve. The cross, which has stood in the California desert for more than 75 years, had been the target of a constitutional battle.


Cross-ing The Mojave

A cross in the desert,
To honor our war dead,
Caused a constitutional fray.

The fight to remove it
Waged through our court system
Till the High Court decreed it can stay

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Free Speech Versus Violence

The Supreme Court will be taking up the issue of free speech again. This time, it's an attempt to overturn a law that forbids the sale of violent video games to children.



Supreme Protection

The folks who sell those games
Depicting violence
Say a law that bans their sale
Is wrong - and makes no sense.

The case has found its way
To the nation's highest court;
Where merchants now all hope
They'll finally find support.

Since kids can tune in cable,
Game sellers think it's lame,
That they, too, can't teach children
How to assault and kill and maim.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Beware Creatures From Outer Space

Professor Stephen Hawking says it’s likely there is some form of life in other galaxies. But he says such creatures are also likely to pose a danger to humans on earth.


ET Stay Home

Space aliens exist, says Doctor Hawking;
And adds that folks on earth should keep away.
He feels such foreign life forms pose a danger
That we should always strive to keep at bay.


© 2010 Jim Gordon

Obama Calls For Banking Law Changes

The president is calling on financial leaders to support his efforts to avoid more fiscal crises. Mr. Obama says an overhaul of banking legislation is needed to head off future bailouts.


Scaling Wall Street

The president wants wall street
To mend its "reckless" ways.
He says that his proposals
Will end the fiscal daze.

But opponents disagree
And don't accept his stats.
They say we just don't need
More federal bureaucrats.

The system caused the bailouts,
Says Obama, in defense,
And adds that overhaul
Is only common sense.


© 2010 Jim Gordon

School Lunches Threaten Military Recruitment

A group in Washington says many of the country's children are so overweight that they'd be unable to deal with life in the military.
The group is Mission: Readiness. It blames the problem on "junk" food served to the youngsters at school.


Food Fight

Seems our kids are getting chubby
From eating lunch at school;
Junk food such as french fries
And stuff that makes them drool.

One group says we're threatened
By obesity galore;
Since such kids are less likely
To defend us in a war.

A retired Navy bigwig
Is fearful of our plight,
With our potential soldiers
Getting much too fat to fight.


© 2010 Jim Gordon