Nancy Pelosi To Keep Leading Democrats

Democrats in the House have voted to keep Nancy Pelosi as their leader. She'll become minority leader in January, when the majority will switch to the Republicans. Pelosi blames her party's losses on continued high unemployment.



                Staying On

The Democrats will keep Pelosi
As their leader in the house;
They don't blame her for their losses
And they see no need to grouse.

Nancy says she's not to blame.
She sees voters as annoyed,
Not by anything she's done,
But because they're unemployed.

 
©  2010 Jim Gordon

Lawmakers Want Vote On Earmarks

Senators plan to force a vote on banning earmarks, the practice of allocating federal money for home-state projects.



Roll Out The Barrel

Politicos like to keep
Constituents grateful
By getting their people
Perks by the plateful.
But many seem ready
To put down the fork
And save the taxpayer
From funding the pork.

 
©  2010  Jim Gordon

Scientists: Time To Head For Mars

Two scientists say humans should begin setting up housekeeping on another planet. They feel Mars is just the spot. Writing in the “Journal of Cosmology", they Pointout that Mars is just six-months away and contend the trip would be faster, and less expensive, if it were one-way.




Blasting Off

Forget the moon
Forget the stars;
The time has come
To aim for mars.

Two scientists
Say let ‘er rip,
It needn’t be
A two-way trip.

So earthlings, now,
Should start to pack
And shouldn’t plan
On coming back.


©  2010  Jim Gordon

President and Congress Face Showdown

With mixed results from his Asian tour, President Obama is facing a challenge from Capital Hill. Among them: a showdown over tax cuts and negotiations with Republicans.



Arguing Left And Right

The president has come back home
To meet the GOP;
He says he wants a compromise -
A way to all agree.

Republicans and Democrats
All rev up their motors.
We can but hope those voted in
Won’t forget the voters.

 
©  2010  JIm Gordon 

Accused thief has wrong “Alibi”

It didn’t take police in Lewiston, Idaho, long to catch up with a suspected burglar. Officials say they arrested Donald Mosely right next door, at the Alibi bar.



On Tap

The alleged robber didn’t get far;
Just next door to the Alibi Bar;
The search was quite brief;
He gave them no grief;
Police see it as rather bizarre.


©  2010  Jim Gordon

Man smokes joint to welcome new baby.

A Pennsylvania man is charged with possessing marijuana for smoking a joint to celebrate the birth of his child. The unidentified man is quoted as saying he wanted to get a buzz.



         But Did He Inhale?

Some new dads might hit the bar,
Or shout out loud “have a cigar!”
But our new papa saw no point
In lighting anything but a joint.

He may be thinking now, just maybe
It was no way to welcome baby.
He simply wanted to “get a buzz,”
But somebody noticed and called the fuzz.

What he did was rather provoking
Even though some others were smoking.
Those others, though, don’t share his lot
Because they didn’t share his pot.

 
©  2010  Jim Gordon

Drug Seeker Calls Cops

A New York man looking for a drug peddler got a crime stopper instead. An Erie County detective sent undercover officers who used the man to help bust a nearby drug buy.



Sorry, Wrong Number

The man on the phone
was looking to score
but it seems he misdialed
and got the wrong "store."

Instead of a pusher,
this unfortunate shopper
found he was talking
to a county Crime Stopper.

Instead of those drugs
the man met a cop
who enlisted his help
to bust a drug drop.


©  2010  Jim Gordon