Thursday, June 28, 2012

Signing leads to jail

Natalie Plummer found her self under arrest after displaying a sign warning drivers of a speed trap. She says she was taken to jail and accused of obstructing justice. Plummer claims she was just trying to get motorists to stop driving so fast.



           Sign Here

Natalie says her mission
Was to slow down people’s driving
But she found herself accused of
Obstructing and conniving.

It’s fine to help your neighbor,
You can write it down or holler;
As long as all your efforts
Don’t foil a lawman’s collar.

 
©  2012  Jim Gordon

Monday, June 25, 2012

Poll shows winner doesn’t matter

Fifty percent of Americans polled say it doesn’t matter who’ elected president as far as the economy is concerned. Voters see much of the problem influenced by financial problems in Europe and political gridlock in congress.



          Office Basics

Half the people questioned
Feel it doesn’t matter much
Who wins the oval office
Since both seem out of touch.

No matter what they promise,
No matter what their skill,
Neither man can help us
Without backing from The Hill.

©  2012  Jim Gordon

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Former tycoon awaits sentencing

Prosecutors in R. Allen Stanford’s trial for fraud want the judge to send the defendant to prison for 230 years. He’s been convicted on charges he ran a Ponzi scheme that bilked investors out of more than $7 billion. Defense attorneys are asking for a maximum of 44 months. Stanford’s been in jail since his arrest in 2009.



                  High Time

The Feds would send Al Stanford
To one of our penitentiaries
For a rather lengthy sentence
Of over a couple centuries.

But if they prove successful,
No need to cry and shed  tears;
With time served and good behavior,
He can get out in a hundred years.

 
©  2012  Jim Gordon

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Trump says he’ll sue Miss USA contestant

Donald Trump says he plans to go to court over Miss Pennsylvania’s allegations that the Miss USA pageant was rigged.  Trump says Sheena Monnin’s charges are “ridiculous” and a case of “loser’s remorse.”


      Courting Charges


Donald Trump’s a bit upset
With Miss Pa. – that’s Sheena.
He calls her charges sour grapes,
Having lost in the arena.

He feels the lady’s less than sharp;
And not all that astute;
He calls her charge nonsensical
And plans to, soon, file suit.

 
©  2012   Jim Gordon

Monday, June 4, 2012

Accusers won’t get aliases

The judge in the Jerry Sandusky trial says prosecution witnesses will not be permitted to use false names. John Cleland ruled the former assistant coach’s accusers must testify using their real names.



    Facing His Accusers

As Jerry’s trial approaches
To take its place in history,
The judge says his accusers
May not remain a mystery.

Says His Honor, it’s quite simple;
For the court to hear their claims,
They’ll face cross-examination
And will tell the court their names.

 
©  2012  Jim Gordon

Sunday, June 3, 2012

More people call for Romney; FDA recalls a toy

News keeps occurring all the time
And doesn’t always clearly rhyme.


Mitt Romney’s favorability rating is up somewhat. The latest poll shows 41 percent of Americans want Romney and 52 percent want Obama.
The other 7 percent want to know why Romney beat up on a gay guy when he was in college and where Obama was born, really.


The FDA is recalling the Imaginarium 5-Sided Activity Center. It says the small wooden knobs attaching the xylophone keys can detach and cause a choking hazard.
Toys R Us received eight reports of the knobs detaching. There were no injuries but in one of the incidents, every time the kid coughs, he plays the C scale.

 
©  2012   Jim Gordon